WORRYING
I don't write as much as I used to because some of what I want to say...scream to the mountaintop about...are things that likely will not change due to biases--unconscious and overt.
What can you do when you look around and see so clearly the biases that people hold? When you know that doors will open or close for some...due to biases? That the rules are ever-changing...for some. It's soul-crushing. Really.
When confronted with the reality that all things are not equal, my only solace is that all things are possible for those who believe. I have to believe this (or maybe I’m trying desperately to convince myself through positive affirmations as I toss and turn through the late night hour).
What do you gain by worrying about circumstances? What do you lose?
These questions were posed during my daily devotion several months ago. As I thought about it, I quickly came to a conclusion that I’ve lost much while worrying about things that are/were out of my control:
Time
Sleep (literally…as I type)
Peace of mind
Creativity
A waistline (yes, extra weight from the weight of stress)
Present moments with family and friends
For what? At what cost?
As I look deep within, one of my greatest regrets right here in this moment is that I know with certainty that I’ll someday look back on the worries of today —many of the things that I thought mattered— and realize that…they didn’t. Why? Because people are going to be who they are, and only the hand of God can change that.
Whenever I have trouble sleeping late at night / in the wee hours of the morning, this scene and song from The Color Purple frequently comes to mind. “Can’t sleep at night…and you wonder why…?”
converse + connect
I’d love to hear your thoughts. Can you relate? How do you deal with worry?
P.S. I tried to find a shorter version of the scene from The Color Purple but couldn’t and decided to include it anyway for those who love this movie. There are just some scenes that you remember as if you watched the movie yesterday, and this is one for me!